Don’t worry, Copper Kid. You’ll fit right in. Well, as best you can, I guess. You may be the only non-human in the Silver Hawks, and you sure talk funny, but here aboard the Miraj we value diversity. That’s why even though the rest of us dress in silver, if you look at the small details, it’s easy to tell us apart.
It’s our job to keep the riffraff out. You know, “undesirables” and seedy types that pop up in the universe. They could be up to all sorts of nonsense. Say, if someone’s wearing weird glasses or a shirt that looks too trendy? It’s best to pull them over and find out what the heck they’re up to. They could be trying to eat a planet or hijack a shipment of valuable orphans.
Upholding earth-based-values across the galaxy is a tough job, and you’ve got a lot to learn, but we’ll get you up to speed. Still, if we want this mentoring program to continue, we’ve got to show our managers results. That’s why at the end of every day, we’ll give you a standardized test about Earth. Won’t that be great?
by Rogan Josh
Remastered for 2014! I’ll have this and many other new prints available at Asbury Park Comic Con this weekend! Look for me at booth C-348 in the CRYSTAL F*ING BALLROOM.